All's Fair, Part 1
All's Fair is the 90th arc in Housepets!. Characters *Keene Milton *Mr. Steward *Fox *Tiger *Ralph *Marvin *King *Bailey *The Wolves Pack **Miles **North Star **"Darth Vader Sanchez" **Rockstar Hawk **Poncho **"Four Finger Discount" Jack **Daryl **Other Daryl *Bruce and Roosevelt *Zach *Karishad *Jessica *Falstaff *Truck *Mr. Bigglesworth *Peanut Plot Keene is confronted by a property tax, despite the fact his father built the home with his own two hands. Mr. Steward tells Keene he could easily afford the tax, but Keene remarks that isn't the point. Keene tries to think of a way to find a loophole so he can have someone else foot the bill. When Steward remarks turning the place into a state fair, Keene gets a terrible idea, and asks to send in Karishad. Steward argues that there's a hundred things wrong with that, but Keene insists. As a member of the K-9 Unit, Fox starts putting down signs closing off the roads, when Tiger tries to grammatically correct them. When Fox tries to explain they're closing off the neighborhood for the fair, a distressed Tiger violently shakes him, asking how the pizza guy will get through. Ralph tells Fox his lesson will be why they don't give free explanations to civilians. Keene holds a press conference, trying to calm down the people who are upset that the state fair is being held in what basically is their backyards. Despite hearing the words "unaccountable," "exploitative" and "astonishingly illegal", Keene's lawyers tell him to deny everything and admit no fault. Nonetheless, he provides everyone a gift for their time, which turns out to be food vouchers. Cut to Tiger, upset because Jerry handed him the tickets and told him that they were his food for next week, thinking he was going on a diet. Marvin tells him that's not what he meant. King gets Bailey tickets for the fair and she excitedly asks to go. Once there, being from Kansas, she asks where the livestock is. King explains that since it's a state fair, they usually don't do livestock shows (or rodeos). Bailey is disappointed and King comforts her by saying there is a petting zoo. Bailey ends up petting Bruce on the nose, saying it feels weird, the roo retorting that this isn't in his usual job description, while Roosevelt waves to onlookers. Marvin questions Tiger on the fact he isn't disappointed that they're going to miss pizza night. Tiger explains it's akin to missing Halloween, only because you found Willy Wonka's golden ticket. A glory-eyed Tiger shows Marvin the tent to the Eating Contest, his paradise on Earth. He asks Marvin to help him fill out the form, as he has stained it with tears of joy. North Star excitedly tells his dad Miles that they caught a horse. Miles scolds them that the fair is not open season. He also tells them it isn't real horsemeat, as the cubs pulled the horse off the carousel, Rockstar Hawk saying that "Darth Vader Sanchez" told them it's candy coated like everything else. Miles tells "Deevee" that fiberglass isn't edible, and the cub frustratedly asks what's with human's obsession with fake food. Marvin looks over the form for the eating contest and tells Tiger there's a fifty dollar entrance fee. Tiger asks where he's supposed to get the money from. He looks over and sees Zach at the job booth, as he needs some extra money. Karishad offers him a job separating rancid hot dogs from the spoiled ones, or a job emptying the puke bucket at the Tilt-A-Whirl, both of which Zach passes on. Karishad then offers a job as a bingo announcer, and after a moment, Zach sheepishly asks what the first two were again. Afterwards Karishad offers Zach a job as a stripper, which he corrects to striper, a candy making job which he cannot do because of his fur being a health hazard. His last job offer is for the petting zoo. Tiger sweeps Zach into his arms and accepts the job on Zach's behalf, stating that he'll hold onto his paycheck for him. Karishad asks if he wants to add it to his eating contest application, which Tiger eagerly accepts. As Tiger carries Zach away, Tiger starts to ask how he knew that, and Zach responds it's better not to ask. Poncho comes over to see his brother, "Four Finger Discount" Jack, operating the Ferris Wheel. Jack complains that he isn't disabled just because he has only one hand. He shows the control panel for the Ferris Wheel, a lever to go, one to go faster, and one to stop, wondering what can come from that. A news report later shows the Ferris Wheel spinning out of control. King lies face first in the grass, dizzy and sick after getting off the spinning Ferris Wheel, while Bailey encourages him to go on another ride. King laments that sometimes he feels like he's wrong for Bailey, since she needs excitement and he often just gets dragged into it. Bailey comforts him, and King explains that he feels inspired when he's with her and that he needs to be "jostled from his comfort zone." He then proceeds to make sick on the grass, claiming that while the spirit is willing, the flesh is a leaky chemical quagmire. Marvin asks Tiger if he's okay with going through this, as he has to play back Zach at some point. Tiger scoffs, noting that he's a shoe-in to win the grand prize. Marvin informs Tiger that some of his competition have been training for years, and Tiger confidently states he'd like to see one person who can match his eating prowess. Meanwhile Daryl and Other Daryl are eating funnel cake, with Other Daryl slurping it like noodles. Daryl asks how he is doing that, and his brother replies he'd practiced. Daryl argues that this is the first time Other Daryl had funnel cake, but Other Daryl says the fair was open yesterday as well. Zach finds Jessica in the petting zoo, eating several corndogs, and asks how she got in. She replies she jumped the unguarded fence like many of the local fauna attracted by the food smells. She offers Zach a corn dog, which he refuses on the account of him being a vegetarian, although Jessica says she's sure there isn't any real meat in it. An onlooker overhears her and claims she might have rabies, although Jessica, as an opossum, is immune to it. The onlooker doesn't believe her. She offers to demonstrate and gets up, asking if his kid is the "soft and spongy" one, while Zach tries in vain to stop her. Falstaff and Truck both come across the flyer for the eating contest. Falstaff is confident because of the scientific principle that the hungry can eat more than the well-fed. He has Truck recite their schedule, "We literally have nothing better to do," and asks Truck if he thinks he can win. Truck is sure, since he only had one (garbage) can of food that day. At a booth, a man is collecting the entry fees for the eating contest. Marvin signs up Tiger, and when he is asked if he signed the waiver, Tiger states he's an expert at waiving. Falstaff signs up Truck, who hands him a "washed" $50 bill. Other Daryl comes by and asks if this is where the lunch line starts. When he is told it is an eating contest, he realizes it's "competitive lunch" and not having hunted for a while, decides to join in. That night, King and Bailey are watching a fireworks show. Bailey asks if King is feeling better, and King offers to get dinner. The two order a large amount of fried food, including four pickles fried like corn dogs. The vendor makes a joke about Bailey being a "mother-to-be," but King light-heartedly says she just likes pickles. Bailey replies that she normally doesn't go for fried food, but now she's eating for four now. King freezes in shock, and Bailey asks if she forgot to mention it. To be continued! Events *Bailey is revealed to be pregnant with King's pups. Trivia *Jessica's statement that opossums are immune to rabies is untrue, but they are still eight times less likely to carry the virus than dogs. *Papers Please is a reference to the video game of the same name. *Tiger's statement that he's an "expert at waiving" is a call back to Here's Your Sign. *Bailey is the third character to become pregnant in the comic; following Snow and Mrs. Holloway. *On June 2nd, Rick was hospitalized with a stomach ulcer, delaying the comic for that week. There was no comic on that Wednesday and a guest strip was provided on Friday. The arc was then split in two parts, with The Plot Against Spot being shown in between. **This is one of six arcs to be split into multiple parts, the others being Heaven's Not Enough, Housepets 5000 BC, Save the Date, Temple Crashers 2: Temple Crashers and My Life As A Teenage Squirrel. Category:Story Arcs Category:Comics Category:2015 Category:End Of Year Category:King Saga Category:Multiple Parts